Supper :)

tonight I made sweet chili pork tenderloin stir fry and bruschetta bread... it was delicious!

News & Not Caring.

Good Morning! It is the beginning of yet another work week, but I won’t be working very much this week! Tomorrow morning Mom and I hope to head down south until Thursday. If all goes well I will be living near Copetown in approximately 1 weeks time, and attending Rehoboth Christian School in Copetown for grades eleven and twelve. So the purpose of going down this week is to meet the Groens, who I hope to be staying with, getting fitted for my uniform, and meet with the school board. Then we will come back home Thursday, I will spend the weekend working, hanging out with people, saying my goodbyes, and packing. On Monday I will head down south again with Rich and Naomi and Abbi and begin my school year.

I’m going to miss my home. I’ll miss being able to bike or walk into town on a road surrounded with lakes and trees. I’ll miss walking through town and being greeted by everyone I meet because I know everyone here. If it doesn’t snow down south this winter I’ll miss the snow, but if it does, I’ll miss my snowmobile. I’ll miss being able to drive to Lowell Lake at the end of the day and taking our boat for a ride. I’ll miss my friends, my coworkers, my family… but somehow, I will survive, and find a way to enjoy being down south. I’ll find a part time job, study diligently, and spend time with old friends from down there. It will be good. Besides, I’ll still come home for holidays and weekends.

Last Friday Mom and I went to Liskeard and I took my road test. Apparently I did well and now have in my possession a G2 level license. I can drive on my own now! If only I had the money to buy a car… I suppose buying a boat with Richie didn’t exactly help. We also went back to school supply shopping. I had no idea it was so expensive!

You know how people are so obsessed with being better than everyone else? Everyone feels that they have to have the latest electronics, the latest vehicle, the lastest fashions in clothing. Got to be cool, have it better than their peers. I feel as though the whole world is caught up in this competition to see who has the most stuff, the best money can buy. I’m also somewhat caught up in it. You know how it is, the Puma shoes, the North Face coat, the Lululemon pants… all the name brands work as a symbol to tell the rest of the world that you have it good. Lately however, I feel myself pulling back from that somewhat. Honestly. Why worry about it so much? I showed someone a picture of my boat once and they made a degrading comment on how it wasn’t very big, powerful or new. I was somewhat offended because for Richie and I right now at the point in our lives, it works fine for us. We don’t need a big fancy boat. I find it rather discouraging how much people compare everything to whatever is currently best in that category. Personally, I don’t need the latest and greatest! The way I see it, I’m lucky to be part owner of a boat. I’m lucky to have a snowmobile that I can use whenever. I have more than enough in this life and it irks me when people feel the need to mention that they have something better. As long as we’re both happy with our own stuff, it doesn’t matter!

Well, I better get going… have a great week!

Heather.

p.s. You may have noticed that there is a new page with photos. I decided to start posting some of my photography. Please realize that there are copyrights on all of my images, all rights reserved. Thank you!

Contemplations

As I sit here on a cheery red bench I contemplate the vast mysteries of life. A chilling wind briskly flaunts about, bringing goose bumps to previously warmed skin. Vehicles rush by in a blur, intent on their destination. Everybody busy living their lives everyday… I wonder, how many people stop for a minute, block out the craziness of life and and just sit. And contemplate. Some people have to use alcohol to relax, some people use music, others use the bad habit of smoking. All people have some sort of method which they use to unwind at the end of the day. Why do we need to unwind? Is life so extremely stressful that we must force ourselves to relax just so we don’t break at some point? Does life have to be this stressful, or do we bring it on ourselves? Have we been raised thinking that we have to work ourselves to the bone in order to be successful? I wonder, is that a bad mindset to be ingrained with? Or is it good, because at the end of the day we are in some measure, on some scale, successful in this world? There are so many things that our society has taught us are important… things like weight, appearances, money, your position in life, popularity, manners,… everything really! I suppose we do need something with which to purchase things because if there wasn’t a system the strong willed people would get everything and the weaker would be in slums somewhere. Although it’s barely any better in our current state, really. The strong, self willed people rise in fame and success rapidly while the weaker, more timid people work diligently and slowly rise, nearly incognito in their success. But I suppose being recognized for your accomplishments isn’t really necessary. In fact, what made it so sought after in the first place? Perhaps because when people do something that they are somewhat proud of they want others to recognize their talents so that their self esteem has some outward support. Why don’t we follow nature’s lead in this area though? I mean think about it. The flowers and trees and rocks don’t shout out about their beauty and usability, they just sit there and are beautiful and usable, in their own way, and people walk past and smile and appreciate them. I suppose the reason people feel the need to flaunt their talents/success’ is because we have been so ingrained with the sense of being in some sort of race or competition. And because of the simple fact that people believe that, we are in one, by common belief alone.

I recently read a book about a woman who was a philosopher and who liked to solve mystery type things on the side. She was pictured as successful, good looking, and with her life pretty much in order. Yet she still second guessed little things, worried about others, and led a fairly normal life. Just because she didn’t have to worry about money didn’t mean she didn’t worry about other things. Where as a poorer person might not worry about the smaller things as much, but would spend a lot of time worrying about money. So in the end both people would spend a fair amount of time worrying, just not about similar subjects. Even children worry about things! Whether or not their little friends truly like them, whether they will receive everything they wished for on their birthdays or Christmas, whether their parents will find out about that chocolate bar they ate right before dinner but weren’t really supposed to… worrying is so extremely unhealthy, yet nearly everyone wastes time engaged in it. How do we get away from it in such a worry ridden society? 

music

retreat into a world of music

block the rest of the world out

forget everything

focus on the music

let it pull you

let it flow through your soul

float on a subconscious wave

close your eyes

feel it move you

let a tear seep out of your closed eyelid

let down your wall for a moment

just breathe

let your strength rest

you'll be alright

let yourself drift away

tomorrow brings another day

~by Heather Van Manen